I think my vagina is haunted
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
