yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
