Got a toothbrush?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
