Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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