That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I have fence marks all over my body
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
