Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
she smelled like a LAN party
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
