Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
