i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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