I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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