I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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