i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
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