That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
areolas are like halos for boobs.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
