Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
