Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
