Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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