I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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