I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
