Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
