The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize
