Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I wish there were birth control emojis
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
