Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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