Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
She said her name was "party"
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
