how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
found the other keg... it's in the tree
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
