I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
