Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
