We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Hippo gnu deer
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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