My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Randomize
