Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Randomize
