that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
