Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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