If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Someone came in the potted fern
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
