where am i from again
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
