Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
