Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
