He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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