i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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