Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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