Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
