I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
