HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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