I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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