On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
