If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
