Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Randomize
