He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
