Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
