if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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