Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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