in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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