I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize
